Payments are too high when…
Waiting at the stop light, a pizza delivery guy pulled up next to me in the left turn lane. I thought to myself, "You know, that might not be a bad job. Driving around listening to the radio all day might be cool." I love it when my job pulls me out of the office and I get to drive somewhere. Of course, the pizza delivery job probably doesn't pay that well.
But who knows...
The car pulled forward and I saw that it was a Lexus. That's right, a Lexus with a cheap Papa Johns sign attached to the window. I wish I had my camera for that.
So, either Papa Johns pays really well, or the car payments are so high that pizza delivery is merely there to supplement his income.
Elian Gonzalez
Remember Elian? His mom died trying to get Elian and herself to the United States. 6-year-old Elian made it only to have a machine gun shoved in his face before being sent back to Cuba.
I know you're all wondering how Elian is getting on now. This happy-go-lucky 14-year-old has joined Cuba's Young Communist Union. Along with a reported 18,000 others, Elian joined the group last Saturday pledging his loyalty to Fidel and Raul Castro.
I am sure his mom would be so proud.
Kiss My Full Moon
Watching CNN the other day, I saw a piece on the Lunar Embassy. What is the Lunar Embassy? Well, some schmuck that calls himself the Head Cheese needed money and figured he could sell real estate. Driving down the road, Mr. Cheese asked himself, "Where is a bunch of real estate I could sell?" He looked out the window and there was his answer. The Moon.
The freaking Moon!
According to the story, this guy has made over 7 million dollars selling plots of land on the Moon. He's making millions selling crap he doesn't even own. And the flip side of this coin is people are buying what he's selling. This business had also spawned copycats doing the same thing.
This pisses me off on many levels. How can someone sell something they don't own? How can people, including past presidents, buy it? The whole thing seems idiotic.
The icing on top of this crap-cake is the Head Cheese has, according to his website "been named co-chairman of the Republican Congressional Business Advisory Council. He has also been given the National Republican Leadership Award and most recently he has been issued the highest honor the National Republican Congressional Committee has, the prestigious Republican Gold Medal."
Another reason it pisses me off is while growing up, I wanted to be an astronaut. I still have a love for all things NASA and outer space. Some a-hole selling plots of land on the Moon somehow cheapens the Moon and treats something that I have dreamed about and held in esteem as a thing of naught. I am failing to explain it, but it pisses me off.
A Perfect Lunch That Almost Was
Some days-like today-I take my lunch in a nearby park. Sometimes I just have to get out of the office.
Today was the perfect day to go. The sky was overcast and the breeze was cool. I would be able to roll down the windows and listen to the radio while not getting too hot. It was going to be the perfect lunch break.
This park also contains a dog park. It's fenced off and has some neat things for the dogs to play on or pee on. There are several fake fire hydrants that I wouldn't get to close to if I were you. There are also benches for the humans on that side off the fence.
So, as I said, lunch was going to be perfect. That is until an idiot dog owner started yapping at his dog.
"Artie. Artie. Artie, come here. Come here, Artie. Artie. Don't do that, Artie. Don't go over there, Artie. Artie, come back. Artie. Artie. Aaaarrrrtieeeee. Aaaarrrrtieeeee."
And it all came out in a near constant stream. The guy wouldn't shut up. He just sat on the bench calling out to his dog like a parent telling a child to stop doing something, but since the parent isn't going to get up, then the kid will just keep doing whatever it is. Annoying, right? Even worse when it's a dog. And do you know why?
BECAUSE DOGS DON'T SPEAK ENGLISH.
Now before you dog owners start jumping up and down saying, "My dog knows sit and beg and stay and kill the neighbors cat." They don't have the foggiest idea what you are saying. They recognize tone, timbre, clip and beat. And that's only after you train the crap of them.
What they sure as my big, fat butt is hairy don't recognize is, "Artie, don't go over there. Don't do that, Artie. Artie, what are you doing? Artie, quote me a sonnet. Aaaarrrrtieeeee. Aaaarrrrtieeeee. Aaaarrrrtieeeee."
ARGH!
