Love in an Elevator

Okay, if you stand right in front of the elevator doors as you are waiting for the elevator, you are a dillhole.  If you are so close to the door, that your big, fat gut starts to spill into the elevator as soon as the door starts to open, you are a dillhole.  If you shove your way into the elevator, bowling over the people who are trying to exit and forcing them to step around your big, fat gut to get out , you are a dillhole.

To the dude in the ugly Hawaiian shirt who is guilty of all the above:  You are a big, fat, freaking dillhole.